1 Corinthians 7:1-9
1 Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. 8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
1 Corinthians 7:25-40
25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away. 32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord. 36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38 So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better. 39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.
In chapter 7 of Paul’s first letter to the church in Corinth, he begins to answer questions that they had written to him. “Now concerning the matters about which you wrote.” There is no way to know from Paul’s answers what the questions were, but it is important to know that the statements Paul makes are in response to specific issues that the church was dealing with. It is also important to know that Paul answers these questions in light of the culture they are currently in and Paul’s own state of singleness and his personal view of singleness as an advantage to serving the Lord. In the selected text we will highlight several principles dealing with being and remaining single and following the call of God.
Paul is not in disagreement with the plurality of the Bible.
Marriage is from God, designed to populate the world and exercise dominion. It was blessed by God and promoted by Jesus. It was used by Jesus to illustrate God’s relationship to the church.
Paul believed in the imminent return of Christ and understood firsthand the persecution the church was susceptible to. In light of that, he is giving advice as to the most effective relational status to advance the Gospel.
1 Corinthians 7:29–31 “29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.”
Paul is not teaching the Corinthians to disregard their spouses but to not indulge in all the typical rituals as a married couple such as rejoicing or mourning. Their focus in this compressed time as a couple should be on the Lord. Paul is not prohibiting marriage but highlighting the gift of singleness that was and is rarely discussed.
Singleness is a gift.
1 Corinthians 7:6–7 “6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.”
Paul indicated that he had a gift of being single. This is in the sense that he was able to remain single and not be consumed with the thoughts of marriage and intimacy with a woman. This seems to be the indicator as to a person having the gift of singleness: if they are able to be single without constant temptation. This would have been deemed as not common but extremely valuable. Paul reinforces this idea with comparisons of himself with others’ circumstances.
1 Corinthians 7:8–9 “8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
Singleness has an advantage in difficult times.
1 Corinthians 7:40 “40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.”
1 Corinthians 7:25–26 “25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is.”
1 Corinthians 7:28 “28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that.”
1 Corinthians 7:32–35 “32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.”
Paul, in addressing the current climate the church was in, saw that marriage in some instances made things much more complicated, and remaining single had great advantages. In distressing times, a single person can commit more fully to the Lord. Marriage and children bring their own anxieties and complications. Paul is not seeing this as a command to stay single, but if you have the gift to be able to remain single, you will have far less worries and more time, ability, and resources to advance the Gospel.
In light of our current culture and global unrest, people are wrestling with the idea of being in a marriage and bringing kids into the world. Paul’s exhortation of singleness looked nothing like what it is today. He was not advocating simply having sexual partners without a marriage relationship. This is the dividing line. If you can refrain from intimacy, then it is evident you have the gift of singleness. If not, get married.
Single and Ready to Mingle
1 Corinthians 7:2 “2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”
1 Corinthians 7:8–9 “8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
1 Corinthians 7:36 “36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin.”
Paul is clearly directing everyone else who does not have the gift of singleness to get married because it is better to marry than to be constantly tempted. Sex outside of marriage was and is a sin called fornication.
First things first - Become who God designed you to be. If you are waiting on a spouse, wait on the Lord.
All the wrong places - Stop swiping and start serving. Do not set aside your relationship with Christ for a spouse. You are not less because you are not married. Do not concede the very thing that makes you who you are.
Common purpose and values are more important than common hobbies. Hobbies change; values and purpose remain.